the now-homeless weep
as nature wreaks its havoc
neighborhoods in flames
security burns to ash
smoke will dissipate slowly
Copyright © 2012 Nan
P.
We Write Poems asked us to write a tanka this week. Tanka is a Japanese form, and the rules are: "1. The poem uses strong images to establish a mood. 2. The poem includes some type of literary device. 3. The poem has five lines, lines 1 and 3 with five syllables, and all others with seven (5-7-5-7-7). 4. The poem can also be five lines, but the syllable count is: 2-3-2-3-3, focusing on the accented syllables. The subject matter is traditionally about nature, seasons, love or other strong emotions.."
5 comments:
I really enjoy the sound devices you've used...wreak and weep, the "u," sounds and then your "s and o," sounds, too.
Such a heart wrenching topic also...well written, Nan!
I agree with Hannah about the sounds. I find 'havoc' and 'ash' pull at me when I read, because of the vowel rhyme.
We have close friends whose house burned to the ground. I have a photograph of them sitting amongst the rubble, backs to the camera, intensely compelling.
I truly cannot imagine how it must feel to lose absolutely everything to fire....what a tragic situation for so many.
Great tanka on a heartrending topic, Nan. The words flow together with the sibilance of water on flames.
Pulling my heart strings... I saw some news footage of the devastation.
You have accurately capture so much in your tanka. And they do get easier...A form I enjoy so I was able to pen mine quickly. I don't necessarily plan what people find - the words just flow.
http://julesgemsandstuff.blogspot.com/2012/07/wwp-112-tanka-july-4.html
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